Coyote Fun

Professor Crim Law is obviously not a Pagan

~Trick or Treat
Trick
~What the...
Here's 30 more pages of Crim Law
~But...
Oh...make that 40
~How about a Snickers?
Get lost

On the way home from Trick-or-Treating....overheard from the back seat:

Hey look, the Milky Way...does the Milky Way really have bottles of milk in it?...they should call it the chicken way...cause I like chicken...when I grow up, I'm going to hunt chickens...look, Christmas!!...Christmas, Cool...heheheh...dork thinks it's Christmas...you told him it was Christmas...you're a dork...you want to hunt chicken, so who's the dork, DORK...when it snows I'm going to make a huge snowman...I'm going to make one as big as the sky...I'm going to make one bigger than daddy...I'll need a ladder to make it that big...then I'll climb up the ladder and kick your snowman's butt...giggle....my snowman will eat when you go to sleep...MOM!!...Happy Halloween.

Lexis Schmexis

Screw you Lexis...Open Memo was due a week ago.

p.s. Try not to be jealous of my wicked huge number of Lexis points.

I did it

Background:
This week, Phi Alpha Delta is sponsoring their semi-annual canned food drive. The basic rules are - bring a can to class, get a pass from the prof. Professors can refuse to participate, participate and adopt the rules as they are, reject them outright , or adopt them with modifications as they see fit.

Professor Crim Law - Outright rejection (though it is unclear whether he intended to participate). He continued to call on folks who had already been called on (despite others having not yet been) and those who had cans in front of them...and people who had both been called and also had cans...the double-shaftees.

Professor Torts - Accepted rules as they were. A can in front of you = a pass and as you might imagine, nearly everyone brought cans creating open season on the handful who did not.

Professor Contracts - Accepted the rules with modifications:
1. The cans had to contain decent food & anyone with anything gross or weird was fair game to be called on - which predictably brought out vienna sausages and potted meat product the following day.
2. You were only allowed to invoke the can=pass protection 1 day during the week (class meets 4 times) and could choose which day it would be
*3. Amended rule - due to a double session of class on Thursday (to make up for a previously cancelled class), you were entitled to protection for only 1 of the 2 hours of that class and could choose which hour it would be.

Professor Civ Pro - adopted the rules with modifications (different day 1 & day 2)
Day One:
1. Since 1 can was too boring, you had to bring 3 cans
2. Cans had to contain something she would reasonably like to eat (no "pigs feet or canned okra")
3. If you were called on and you had the cans you could either take the heat, or you could get credit for being prepared AND designate a fellow classmate to take the fall for you.

This created an interesting dilemma - take the heat or pass it on? There were obvious advantages to taking the heat yourself - gratitude of fellow classmates, not having to out someone, and the admiration of the prof for being a stand-up guy. Clearly, though, there was incentive to pass the buck - not having to be on...and not having to be on (the subject matter this week is fairly complicated and the cases are tedious and dull). If you choose someone...who should it be?

Day Two:
1. Can(s) had to be interesting (and same rule about grossness applied)
2. If you were called on and you had can(s) you could choose to be on, or put another student in your stead
3. If the other person you chose ALSO had can(s), the class would vote on the interestingness of each student's offering - the less interesting of which would be on.

I got the call on day 2. First question...'would you like to take the questions or choose someone else?' I chose someone else. I chose the gunner. I had thought about it and came up with the best case scenario...go for the gunners. First of all, they enjoy being the center of attention, they like showing off their big brains, they like monopolizing class time and prof's attention, they deserve a bit of retribution for irritating the rest of us and they are most lkely to be prepared and least likely to be offended to get the call. Now, which gunner would it be? I decided to go for the one who wastes the most amount of my time with endless questions and head-pat-seeking behavior and who, quite fortuitously, had pointed out something the day before that had it not been pointed out might have been beneficial to the rest of the class. There were audible gasps, snickers, and sounds of shock/appreciation...which I hadn't expected. The gunner didn't look happy. I didn't care. The gunner was not well prepared. I didn't care. The gunner probably thought I was picking on him/her. I didn't care. It was a small victory and sweet reward for the past few months. After class, someone told me that they were in love with me now. Ahhh - it was all worth it. Good day.

I'm going as FRCP 3

The election looms, mischief night draws near and people seem to have written off The Curse as a done deal...so the only thing to talk about is:

a.) Why John Kerry is a baby-killing, bleeding-heart, soft on terror, big on brains, tax loving, business hating, tree-hugging, vote missing, holier than thou, rich as hell, Vietnam faking, liberal Senator from Massachusetts who shouldn't be president because a vote for him is a vote for the Terrorists
b.) Why George Bush is retarded
c.) Why Nader will be happy to get 1% of the vote
d.) Why you registered to vote in VA when you came to school here even though you are a Democrat and now realize that your vote would have been more helpful in your home state of FL, OH, WI or MI.
e.) What to wear to the Halloween Party this weekend

*Disclaimer: Mischief night is not something I gleaned from my childhood. In fact, I had never heard of it until someone here mentioned it. No one else within earshot could vouch for its existence. I suspect it is a stupid PA thing.

Bitching

My babysiter quit on me yesterday...or semi-quit anyway. And to think, there are actually law students who drink and frolick and even study when they are done with class....while I shall be home smashing my head against the wall while reading for class. It's not a big distinction really, but I've got to say (selfish as it sounds), I'd like an hour or two of peace and quiet after class to prepare for the next day. Bitching over.

Blood, Sweat, Tears and Cigarettes

That's what I put into the open memo. That and a lot of Bluebook panache. I own the Bluebook - it is my bitch. Here is my diary of a 1L Open Research Memo Assignment:

11 Oct

10:45 am: Assignment distributed - due 23 Oct @ noon.
10:45-10:50: Assignment explained.
10:50-11:00: General bitching ensues amongst classmates.
11:00-11:30: Give serious thought to thinking about a future time to read the assignment.
11:30-1:00: Lunch, first time memo is forgotten about.

12 Oct

11:00: Memo remembered. Shit.
3:00: Assignment read. This is going to be a piece of cake.
3:05: Thoughts about assignment lead to hankering for cake.
3:10: Get cake. Yum. Cake. Forget about memo.

13 Oct

11:00: Remember memo. Remembering sucks.
11:05: Remember that tomorrow and the next day are fall break - no classes. Woohoooo!!
11:06: Remember memo. Fall break sucks.

14 Oct (no classes)

8:00: Think seriously about getting up and going to school. Memo awaits.
10:00: Think some more about getting up.
11:30: Get up. Decide to go for a road trip.
Midnight: Promise myself to work on memo tomorrow. Tomorrow sucks.

15 Oct (no classes)

9:00: Up and at ‘em. Off to school. I'm gonna knock this memo out today and be done with it.
9:30 - 2:00: Research, research, research, dead-end, cold, warmer, jackpot, jackpot, jackpot...
2:30: Shepardize.
3:00 - 3:15: Curse Shepardizing. Curse legal writing for not giving me Lexis/Westlaw yet.
3:15: Lunch. Arby's. Yum.
4:30: Formulate my basic plan (in my head...of course).
4:45: Decide I've done enough. Figure there's lots of time left. Decide not to rush it.

16 Oct (Sat)

OK, I really don't know what I did this day - but I know it wasn't research, writing, studying or anything else not boring but interesting enough to remember.

17 Oct (Sun)

10:00: Go to school. School sucks.
10:00 - 12:00: Email, checking my school mailbox, more email, BS with fellow memo'ers.
12:00: Lunch.
1:00: Decide I've done enough. Realize I haven't done anything. Decide I am OK with that. Home.
8:00: Remember that I haven't done reading for class tomorrow. Reading sucks.
8:01 - 11:00: Read. Realize that I had a lot more to do than I realized. Ugh.

18 Oct - 21 Oct

To sum up, got a shit load of work heaped on, took lots of time to do it, memo set aside and fretted about mildly in the back of my mind...until....class for Friday was cancelled, memo deadline pushed back 5 hours and more cake...saving grace....no more fretting.

21 Oct (evening)

Poker. Rain or shine. Nearly won. Didn't.

22 Oct (no classes)

10:00: Get to school. This is it. It's all going to come to me now. Once I start writing, it will just flow...from my brain...like a faucet....from a well....which is dry. This sucks. Snickers. M&M's. Snickers. Candy Corn. Ready to go. Write. Write. Write. I'm on fire. Realize I need more research. Decide to write more...research later (this - I should mention is not something that I advocate, although, come to think of it, I really don't advocate anything so there's not much to worry about there). At some point - and really I don't know when it was - I emerge from my carrel like a hairy beast that has been drug out of its lair into the sunlight for the first time in months. I growl at those I see. Especially those jerks who don’t even have a memo assignment yet. Take pleasure in knowing that they will be doing theirs while I'm prepping for finals. Laugh maniacally - on the inside. Snickers. Smoke. Smile. Talk with fellow memo'ers. They are all here. Gotta love a school that is open 24/7. The lot of us, just dragging around, strung out on coffee and pixie stix, chain smoking, putting a brave face on, some 'padding' their status - "I've just got to proofread...and do a few other things", others blatantly admitting they're 3 No-Doze shy of wigging out and/or crapping themselves in a combination of fear and shame for having waited so long. They are all here. The gunner, the do-gooder, the freak who screwed the curve for everyone on the midterm (said with love), the LLM, the hot guy, the other guy, the prissy girl, the girl who stopped smoking at the worst time, the saint, the sinner, the slacker, the butcher, the baker, the candlestick maker. My friends. My collegues. My competition.

Late: Left. More to do tomorrow. Grocery shopping. I fucking love 24 hour grocery capability. Drive home in the rain. It was an odd feeling - the kind of night that I usually love...a chill in the air, the smell of fireplaces burning, the pitter of little raindrops and the swishing of my wiper blades, jazz on NPR, heated seat - that's right - I get to use my heated seats now - screw the desert...but I didn't really enjoy it…OK I enjoyed the toasty seat. I mostly thought about the memo...the assignment worth 2/3 of my grade for legal writing. I thought about my grade for the closed memo (the other 1/3) and wished it had been better....and knew that I would have to do better this time. I went to bed late knowing that I would have to get up early.

23 Oct - D-Day2 (Sat)

9:00: (didn’t get up as early as I had planned) School. Read work from yesterday...still pleased...good sign.
9:30 - 10:30: Hit the library - tie up loose ends.
10 ish: Curse the fucking copier in the stacks - the piece of crap, bane of my existence throughout this damn memo. If, and that's a big IF, the copier would be generous enough to actually copy AND release the freaking paper, it would come out looking like the little paper fans I made as a child. If the copier was not so generous, I'd get a multiple site paper jam indicator which a fucking copier engineer (are there such people?) couldn't decipher...upon which the dance would begin...open this door, close it, slide this piece, turn that knob - where is the stupid paper??? Round and round we'd go until one of us was too run down to continue...then back at it we'd go. At some point, I managed to get all my copies made, remembered to take my swipe card out of the machine and flipped the copier the bird as I left. PC Load Letter this - you POS.
10:30 - 10:45: Shepardize again. Shepardizing still sucks...only more now.
10:45 - 11:30: Read new material, make notes, good stuff.
11:30 - 1:00: Write, re-write, re-write.
1:00: Nearly leave for lunch. Opt for a snack size snickers and 6 candy corns instead.
1:05 - 2:00: Final touches. Re-working, polishing, more cursing, a few cigarettes, 3 swigs of vodka (not really...)
2:00 - 2:30: Final Bluebooking. Bluebooking rocks. I told you - the Bluebook is my bitch.
2:30 - 2:55: Print, re-print, re-print, re-print...typo, typo, typo and then....
3:00: It's done. My legal love child is born. 2 hours before the deadline. I rule. Pack up all source material...seal...take The Walk.
3:01 - 3:05: The Walk. Down the hall...past the folks on my floor still working...spontaneous cheering erupts…not really…up the stairs...around the corner...through the library...past more folks still working...smiles all around...wonderful feeling begins to bubble...up the stairs...around the corner...more smiles...up the stairs...around the corner...down the hall...into The Box. I wasn't first...but I was far from last. The Walk back was just as good.
3:10: Time to leave. I see a few people along the way...some done, some not. Those done have a smile they just can't erase...what a relief. The feeling is incredible - like I’m a new person. I drive home a born again law student and enjoy the rain drops, the fireplaces, the fall colors, the picture perfect postcard that is Lexington.

West Wingin'

First off - how bout them boys from Boston? Good on ya.

I watched the premiere of The West Wing last night. It wasn't as spectacular as I had hoped for. No crazy plot twists, no pregnancies, no sassy outbreaks. I can't help but think I had a better impression of WW before this show, but maybe that's just the natural disappointment that comes with hype (even self induced hype).

I didn't find the jarring Leo-left-in-the-hall scene jarring at all. I wasn't shocked that Leo wasn't invited to Camp David - Leo often stays in the White House while Bartlett is away. If Donna and Josh sleep with each other - that's it. Toby seems to have lost his spunk. I still don't like Bangs.

As for the upcoming season...hmmm....Alan Alda?? I'm not sure on that one. He used to be funny, then moderately entertaining...leans towards boring at this point in his career. Jimmy Smits? Never been a fan of his - so I'm sure I'll thoroughly enjoy his appearances as well. Maybe he'll get shot.

It seems that the show is alluding to some sort of breakdown by Leo. It appeared that he either 1.) was shot, 2.) was having a heart attack, 3.) was masturbating by a tree, or 4.) found Josh and Donna doin' it in the woods. Should be interesting.

Never was a morning person

I hate mornings. Mornings are when the bed is warmest, the house is quietest, the sleep is bestest. Mornings are when showers are coldest, roads are wetest and Crim Law is dullest. I want to sleep sleep sleep. I have to read read read. Whoever said law school was fun didn't have a comfy bed, a fireplace or a heart.

The O'Pervert Factor

TSG reveals the conservative's alleged indiscretions - including phone sex, marital infidelity and inability to keep his mouth shut.

I Love Virginee

Overheard at the checkout last night:

"Look how fat Jennifer Anniston got."

"Hey, check it out - Christopher Reeves died."
"No way. You know he was the first person to fly on TV?"

"Did you get the camouflage boots too?"

"AWESOME!! Reese's finally made something without chocolate in it."
[20 seconds later] "Oh, nope - see they put some in there after all. Damn it."

[Husband to wife] "Lookie here - Now she is having a bad hair day."

"Do you think if it snowed inside it would actually be rain?"

"I want to make me a bear tooth necklace this year."